I can’t fathom why…

…people think that I’m going to explode at any moment. I admit to feeling stress from my various responsibilities, but I can confidently say that I’m nowhere near a meltdown. And yet, that’s what I keep hearing: Russ is stressed out, so don’t piss him off.

I just cannot figure out what it is I’m doing that makes people fear my unexpected explosion so much. I feel like people expect me to be either bubbly happy or on the verge of screaming, and I can’t change that perception.

It’s really annoying, because I know how much it takes to make me freak out and what I’ve got on my plate is nowhere near that level. That’s why I’m so confused.

It’s clearly a signal I’m sending, so I’ve only myself to blame. I just can’t figure out what that signal is, or what I can do to remedy it? Arguably, it’s just part of who I am. However, I’m pretty sure there was a point in my life when I was the same person and people didn’t perceive me as being stressed out. I’d like to know what’s different between the Russ of the past and the Russ of today.

Why does this matter? Because I don’t want people to be afraid to talk to me or tell me things, wondering if they’ll send me over the edge. If that happens, then I’m not being as effective as I can be. Perhaps more importantly, I’m not being as personable and friendly as I want to be.

Any suggestions?