I am eating the most fantastic apple

And I thought you should know.

It’s crispy, juicy, and sweet…kinda like me. And slightly cold from being kept in the fridge…unlike me.

Ha ha.

I thought about making a joke about it being yellow on the outside and white on the inside, but that would be in poor taste. And if you don’t get the joke (which I believe I’ve made before) then tough luck, cuz I’m not going to explain it again. Besides, it’s both red and yellow on the outside, which just wouldn’t make sense.

Seriously though, what a great apple. I think it’s a red delicious, and boy is it ever.

It probably sounds like I’m getting way too excited about a simple apple, but I’m probably overstating a little bit just to underscore how pleased I am.

What’s helping a lot is that I had low-to-medium expectations for this apple. I had bought a few last week and forgotten about them until yesterday, so this is the first one I’ve eaten. I thought I’d missed the “best before” date, and adjusted my expectations accordingly.

It just goes to show, when you set achievable goals, you can be very pleased with the results.


The problem now is that the next apple will receive high expectations, and may not live up to them. It’s a downhill slope from here.

So I’m just going to enjoy this one while I’m able to.

At the same time, by knowing that I know the next apple will have high expectations, I can lower my expectations such that it will still exceed them. But by knowing that I know that I know that, will I really know that?

Yeah, you know what? I don’t feel like doing the “know that you know that I know” bit right now. It requires both of my hands on the keyboard, which is preventing me from enjoying my apple.


In other news, I put my winter tires on this past weekend, just in time for another warm spell. Ah well, what’re you gonna do?

I’ll tell you what I’m gonna do.

I’m gonna finish my apple.



  1. It’s probably not a red delicious apple. Red delicious are entirely red with no yellow and Ironically they are not delicious. Macintosh is red and a little green. If it’s a really large apple it might be a Fuji. There is also one called a snow crisp or a something or other crisp which has red and yellow…

Comments are closed.